Scales
by KrisEleven
Summary: We had always assumed that I would die first. I had not realized just how much my heart was counting on that.


"Move, Jane!"

The scream came out of the noise of battle and I jumped to the side, my feet dragging in the mud. My attacker fell past me, regaining his purchase on the slippery ground in an instant before turning to attack again. Theodore's training held true, and I countered the move with a block and a thrust of my own. The enemy- the man- fell.

"Can you at least try to stay alive?" Gunther shot at me, but I was cut off from replying when a shout from up front caused us to kneel in the mud, our shields held above our heads- "Arrows!" Theodore's baritone voice echoed across the fearful din of the battlefield. I felt a jolt as one the arrows deflected off my shield. After a moment of calm we were up again, back to the war again. I scanned the skies for any sign of Dragon.

_You big newt_, I thought, trying to hide my desperation even from myself. _This is no time to hide away!_

I took a deep breath. I was hot and tired and I ached from the blows I had taken, and the weight of my armour and the stress of this battle, which we had been fighting now for over a day. There was no time to stop and rest. No way to get away from the death and the sounds of the dying. There was only time to fill my lungs and raise my sword as a giant of a man brought his down towards my collarbone.

Our swords caught, and he used his superior strength to push me back as he tried to free his blade. I held on and kept my feet. If I fell now, he would kill me. My sword jerked to the side and something hit me, hard, in the face. As I fell, I realized that he had got our swords out of the way and punched me. I lay on the ground, dazed, for a moment as three thoughts flashed through my head, quickly, one after the other. The first was that this mud was going to be very uncomfortable when I got up. The second was that it had been very unchivalrous to hit me. The third, as my head began to clear and the stars faded, was that I should probably move as-

I rolled and he hit the ground where I had been laying with the sword that had been freed. I realized my hands were empty when he started towards me and I leapt to my feet, dodging backwards from the deadly blade. The pain of my cheek was forgotten, my dizziness ignored. I had to find my sword, but could not begin to look for it in the ankle-deep mud as I dodged another thrust. My gaze left my attacker for a moment as something above his head caught my attention. I dove to the side, landing face first in the muck. The flames shot over me as Dragon roasted the man where he stood.

"Jane?" He called out as he flew over my head.

"I am alright, Dragon!" I yelled after him, spitting mud from my mouth. Given a brief moment, I searched the ground and saw a glint of steel: my sword lay a few feet away. Pointedly ignoring the charred body, I ran over to my dragonblade. Where I stood was empty of the enemy: they had retreated to their gate, fighting off our soldiers as they tried to get behind their walls and lock themselves in, but we were ready for them. Sir Theodore called for the battering ram. I moved to join the men- I could see Gunther running towards them. The gate was being shut, leaving men of both sides outside.

A loud crack caught my attention, and my neck snapped as I looked towards the castle. _No…_

Dragon turned in midair, circling to get back over me. Somewhere behind the castle walls, a catapult had been fired. I watched in horror as they collided in midair, my Dragon -my best friend- and a cart-sized boulder. They fell together and lay, unmoving.

He screamed and I was running before I realized it, running towards his green form, lying in the mud while battle continued around me. He had landed close to the walls, where the battle still raged and I knew I should be paying attention, I knew that, but ran heedlessly anyway. I heard that scream again and realized that it was not Dragon. It was me…

"Jane, no!" I heard Gunther's voice, but did not stop, even as I swerved around an enemy, only saved by the fact that I was small and quick, and he was not. Gunther yelled his battle cry, buying me precious time. I fell to the ground next to Dragon.

"Get up! Dragon. Dragon! Get up!" My voice sounded like it was echoing through Dragon's cave, and my lips were numb. He did not move.

I ran my hand over his still-warm scales frantically. _No. No. This cannot- He is not- I am not able-_I heard the fighting behind me and dimly I realized that Gunther was trying to protect me as I knelt here, as defenceless as a child. But I could not get up.

We had always assumed that I would die before him. I did not realize just how much my heart had been counting on that.

"Get up. Jane! Jane, please." Gunther's voice was right behind me. He grunted and I heard a splash and a tiny gasp. I was up before I realized it, taking in the scene in an instant: Gunther lay sprawled in the mud, one of the enemy standing over him. My sword had cut him down before I had even thought about moving.

"Gunther…" I tried to call, but it came out in a whisper, one of the thousands lost on the battlefield. There was a crash. The battering ram had made it through the front gate. Our troops were inside. Gunther lay in the mud while Dragon… Dragon. "Gunther, please be-" I whispered again. He groaned and sat up and I caught my breath. I had thought I had lost him, too. I helped him stand up and he tried to wipe off his sword as best he could while I turned back to Dragon, one last time.

"I love you, Greenlips," I murmured, my face pressed against his cooling scales.

I turned back towards Gunther before he had a chance to pull me away. I wanted to wipe the tears off my face, but it would have just rubbed mud in my eyes. I knew that Gunther would know, anyway.

"Come on, Jane," he said from beside me, almost too low for me to hear. "Hold on for me."

I did not answer. We had reached the wall, the rest of the knights were already inside. There was no more time for thought.

* * *

There was no way to bury him. Just burying our soldiers was enough of a task in itself- each soldier had his own grave. The enemy did not get the same consideration. Large holes were dug and they shared them by the dozen. If I was not so heartsick and tired I may have protested. I did not.

There was no way to bury him. Theodore told me in the way he had of being kind while affording no argument- "Concentrate on what needs to be done, Jane. You are a knight of the realm, still." Ivon would have said it in stronger terms, had he been there. He was one of the first we had buried that morning.

The sun set as our work was finally finished- strangely fitting. The soldiers and the knights moved off together, their heads bowed and their shoulders slumped. Surely not the victory we had imagined. Dragon lay on the field where he had fallen, his wings curled dejectedly behind him in the mud. I did not have to try to fight back tears this time- no one was there to see me. But the tears did not come. I almost screamed at the unfairness of it. I could not keep this inside anymore. I just could not handle it.

"Jane?" I turned to see Gunther- as worn and world-weary as I must have looked. His eyes were red and puffy, but I knew he would deny it if I mentioned it. Becoming a knight had only made him more determined to not show weakness.

To me, his crying over Ivon only made him stronger.

He stood awkwardly for a moment- looking at the ground instead of at me. "I- I do not think he would want to be in the ground, Jane," he said, finally, his voice much too old. "He was born for the air. If we make a pyre, he can at least be free."

It took us all night to build the pyre. I wanted nothing left of Dragon on the ground. Gunther was right- he would have hated being trapped in the earth. As we lit the fire I had a moment of fear that he would not get his peace, but he did. Gunther and I stood side by side until the heat and the light of the flames drove us back. The fire burnt so bright and so hot that we could not see what was happening within it until it was over. And by then Dragon was gone. The tears came, then.

Gunther, with tears of his own, led me back to the castle.

* * *

I sit on the very edge of my tower- looking out over the grounds. At first all I could hear was the wind and all I could see were my tears. I had returned with Theodore and Gunther a week ago, and I know my friends and my parents are frightened of what they see of me. My heart is too sick to reassure them.

As I sit on the edge, slowly, I begin to hear more. The prince and princess are yelling in the royal gardens. Prince Cuthbert is too old to play silly games, but he does so for his sister. He has grown in much more than age since the endless talks of war began, and protects his sister fiercely. Smithy's wheel and hammer beat together as he works at his forge.

I blink and I begin to see more. Rake and Pepper are standing in the garden. Rake hands her a basket, and gets a kiss in thanks. I am sure he blushes, even though I cannot tell from up here- he always does, even after all this time. Gunther walks into the training yard and exchanges a greeting with Smithy. They have become friends over the years- Smithy is the only one to understand all of the things that Gunther does not say. I had hardly realized all that my fellow squire had held back until I had too many hidden pains of my own.

The wind blows across my face and I close my eyes. If I pretend hard enough- I can believe that Dragon is in that breeze. I breathe in deeply.

A small sound behind me warns me and I smile- my first since I realized what war means.

"Do you feel it?" I ask without looking behind me.

"Feel what?" Jester replies, his hat letting out a sweet sound as the wind shifts the bells.

"I am not sure yet," I reply. I turn to look at him, and he responds to my smile with a bright one of his own. "But I am sure that Dragon would call it an adventure."

* * *

A/N Thanks again to my lovely beta Lightning Flash. Edited 12/01/10


End file.
